Tonight I feel like a complete failure. We have so many youth in the archdiocese and I wish I could meet all of them and talk about Jesus but I can’t. Why was I gloomy last week? It’s because I got a message from someone telling me that there were three suicides in one of our communities. I did not deal with those news too well. These are not the news you want to hear or even expect to hear.
I might not of known these girls very well but I still know that they were important to many but also to me. All the youth in the Archdiocese of Keewatin-Le Pas have a special place in my heart. They are the reason why I’m here in the north, they have shaped me to be a better woman and taught me to serve our God in an even better way. But it’s when things like this happen, I feel like I am to blame even though I know it’s not my fault.
I was watching a movie with one of my housemates while surfing through Facebook and I saw something new, another suicide. I was devastated, went to my room and shed more tears. We lost four girls in less than a week, why is this happening? One of them was only 10 years old, a tragedy. Continue reading “Help me.”→
I wasn’t planning on blogging today but then I had a crazy thought…. Why not?
Have you ever started something and thought this is never going to work, I’m a failure. And then you realize wait it’s actually working, I’m not actually as much of a failure that I thought I was!
I say this because I have never been a runner, I like running but running was never my thing. Two Fridays ago I was sitting in my room, probably watching a funny cat video or something like that and I had this crazy thought why don’t I go for a run? I told you it was a crazy thought!!! I look like a dying chipmunk when I run, not a pretty site. But eh the thought came to mind and I couldn’t shut it down because it was actually a good idea.
Ok, I have something to admit, something that I tried hiding for years and year but it’s time I finally come clean with it. I have… I can’t say it…. I am…. hmmm… I’m a freak. I have something called Brachydactyly Type D (BDD).
What the heck is that? I like to think of it as strange dinosaur disease, yes, I’m actually a dinosaur. Hehe, now I’m sure you’re confused…. unless you know what BDD is then I will give you a high5! *High5*
Basically BDD means that the distal phalanx of the thumb alone is shortened, in other words the nail bed of my thumbs is wider than it’s long, weird eh?
The other day I heard a comment that was very upsetting. The comment was something like bigger women should never wear a bikini because it’s not flattering on them. Now before I keep going on I have to state that I’m actually against women wearing bikinis as I believe they reveal too much but that’s a story for another day
Depression, now this is a hard one to talk about but I was inspired by Jean, a friend of mine. This is what she said I can’t walk forward facing backwards!
Big shout out to Jean as she’s been helping me with this. Without me telling her about what I was going through she knew I needed a shoulder to cry on. You know what she did? She sent me an email with pictures of Mary with quotes and verses. This was an instant pick me up as I knew I wasn’t alone even though I felt as though I was alone.
This has to be my favourite psalm. It’s the psalm I encourage everyone to pray and to pray it everyday. The very thing that I love about this psalm is that everyday something new catches my eye.
I suggest that you start by reading it slowly, then meditate and eventually pray with it. God speaks through Scripture.
This psalm reminds us that we are all sinners and that we are in need of His mercy. Imagine a world without mercy, can you do that? I tried imagining it and what I saw was terrible. Without God’s mercy we wouldn’t have confession. Many of us would be like walking skeletons, we’d be lost, confused with no way to get closer to God. We would most likely all be in a state of mortal sin meaning that we would be completely separated from God. There would be no hope.
Thank God this isn’t our reality! We have a merciful God, a God full of love and peace. A God who gave up His own life for us. He died on that cross for the sins we had not even yet committed.
Have mercy on me, God, in your kindness. In your compassion blot out my offense. O wash me more and more from my guilt and cleanse me from my sin.
My offenses truly I know them; my sin is always before me Against you, you alone, have I sinned; what is evil in your sight I have done.
That you may be justified when you give sentence and be without reproach when you judge, O see, in guilt I was born, a sinner was I conceived.
Indeed you love truth in the heart; then in the secret of my heart teach me wisdom. O purify me, then I shall be clean; O wash me, I shall be whiter than snow.Continue reading “Psalm 51 Miserere”→